Because I am a Woman

This blog is about sex-positivity, sex-ed, feminism, reproductive justice, birth justice, intersectionality, and activism. Because I am a Woman features articles, news, opinion pieces, digital media, and original information posts on all of the topics and more.

Although this blog is run by just one person, BCIAW also works with several contributors to bring readers a steady stream of original and thought-provoking posts. If you wish to join the team, please fill out and submit this application

For more information about any of these things please check out the resources tab or leave me a question in my ask box! I would love to talk to you!

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Asker Anonymous Asks:
I've always heard that you can only get pregnant four days out of the month but my OBGYN has told me that it's possible every day. Can this be explained?
becauseiamawoman becauseiamawoman Said:

Yeah— that is a myth. When in doubt, trust your OB/GYN. Although it is more likely for someone to become pregnant while ovulating you can become pregnant at any point during the month.

People who count on this in order to prevent pregnancy use fertility-awareness, or natural family planning methods. This involves tracking when you are most fertile and abstaining or using a barrier method during those times. There are many methods to do this, but I personally do not recommend them as a primary method of pregnancy prevention as it is difficult to follow and not as effective as many other options. According to Planned Parenthood, these methods are about 76% effective with average use. 

They recommend this option of pregnancy prevention for those who:

  • have received careful instruction have only one sex partner and they are as committed to fertility awareness-based methods as you are
  • have the discipline you need to check and chart your fertility signs
  • don’t mind abstaining or using withdrawal, a cervical cap or diaphragm, a sponge, spermicide, or latex or [internal] condoms on your unsafe days 
Asker Anonymous Asks:
Hi BCIAW, I'm strongly considering getting a menstrual cup and I was wondering if you could help me make the final decision. I like both the Lunette and Moon cup, but I'm not sure if there's really a difference between the two beyond how the sizing is done.... I'm 25, have no children, but have a moderate/heavy flow depending on the month. Any opinions or advice is greatly appreciated :)
becauseiamawoman becauseiamawoman Said:

Menstrual cups for the win!! I’ve got both a Lunette Cup and a Diva Cup myself, and I’m a big fan. I don’t know much about the Moon Cup as I haven’t tried it myself. Honestly, it is hard to say if there are any real differences aside from appearance and size in the cups. Lunette does come in a lot of fun colors though, and that is major plus for many who are uncomfortable with the see-through cups.

You can check out our posts on menstrual cups here blog features on menstrual cups for more specific information on all of these here:

Asker Anonymous Asks:
A while ago I read an article about how yoga is a westernization of Eastern culture and that the way it is practiced here is not how it's supposed to be done. I used to do yoga a lot but ever since I read that I can't look at it the same way. However I really miss it, I liked the exercise/stretching aspect of it and the calmness I felt when leaving class. Do you know of any alternative to yoga that's not cultural appropriation?
becauseiamawoman becauseiamawoman Said:

I don’t know of any alternatives, but I’ve actually written a post on cultural appropriation and yoga that you can check out here. I don’t really know of any alternatives, but here is a passage from the post that I think speaks to a lot of this:

So should you toss out your yoga mat? There is no easy answer to this incredibly complex topic, and this is simply not something I get to decide. Yoga most certainly does have tremendous healing and health benefits, but that does not discount it as something that could be appropriative. Yoga continues to be important to the mental and physical health and wellness of many. It has an incredible history of helping those in need of spiritual and physical healing after trauma and sickness (specifically PTDS and sexual assault/abuse).  However, the Westernized version of yoga practiced by most in the US is not the same yoga practiced in its original form. What we most often see here is just a trimmed-down trendy yoga that is divorced from most of the tradition and spiritual practices that come with it. So yes, yoga does have great health benefits but it can also be appropriative (and often is). 

What we can do about it is also not a simple answer. Most importantly, we must listen to South Asian people about this issue (although there seems to be mixed opinions out there on it). Is this something they want to share, and if so, is the way we are practicing it respectful and mindful of its historical and spiritual context? You can’t just take the parts of yoga you find useful.

Youarenotdesi has offered some suggestions on practicing yoga respectfully. They write that:

Yoga is South Asian and therefore the only people who should be sharing it with others are South Asians.

A way to tell if your white girl yoga teachers are ANY good and actually respect the traditions they’re drawing from is that they’ll pronounce namaste correctly (not like ‘nah-maas-té’ but like ‘nuh-muss-thay’). If you’re going to learn yoga and do it on the regular AT THE VERY LEAST read up on the origin, history, traditions, prayers, etc. of yoga. Learn about it as you would anything else that’s highly cultural. Don’t just pop in a DVD and do it because it’s ‘exercise.’ There’s pilates for that.

Asker Anonymous Asks:
What's wrong with hairy lesbians? That Jill Filipovic quote throws a lot of women GNC or not under the bus.
becauseiamawoman becauseiamawoman Said:

Nothing is— the quote is saying that feminist are cast in these extreme polarized stereotypes. It isn’t that there is anything wrong with being hairy or a lesbian (because there is not), it is that this is one of the stereotypes about feminists perpetuated by the misinformation around feminists in the media. 

I’d suggest giving the article a once-over. 

I did this radio show and the deejay asks me, ‘What if you woke up tomorrow and you were beautiful?’
What do you mean ‘what if’?
He said, ‘What if you woke up and you were blonde and you had blue eyes and you were 5’11 and you weighed 100 pounds and you were beautiful? What would you do?’
And I said, ‘Well, I probably wouldn’t get up ‘cause I’d be too weak to stand.’
And I felt very sorry for him, ‘cause if that’s the only kind if person that you think is beautiful, you must not see very much beauty in the world.
And I think everybody is beautiful. And if you don’t think that I am beautiful, you are missing out. Because I am so beautiful.

Margaret Cho: Beautiful (via justanothersinger)

I want this tattooed on the inside of everyone’s eyelids.

(via aka14kgold)

I woulda smoove cussed his ass out on air.

That’s so fucked up

(via tashabilities)

(via huffingtonpostwomen)