Sex can be: fun, scary, exciting, unknown, wonderful, awkward, hot…adjective adjective adjective. But sex can never and should never be without desire to have it. (For the sake of respecting perspectives, I should note that love-making will also henceforth be considered as “sex.”)
Pressure can come in many different shapes and forms. Pressure to have sex and pressure to not have sex. It can go from your partner pressuring you to have sex to your mom telling you that you better not be having sex or she’ll kick your butt out of the house.
Ultimately, it is your personal decision when you should have sex (or not). Whether it be for the first time, or for the 23rd time—it doesn’t matter. You hold the ultimate say.
Your government may also have laws (or whatever) for age of consent*. You can find a list of worldwide ages of consent here and a list of individual state ages of consent for the U.S. here.
But the government isn’t closely following your own personal sex life (or at least I hope so), so it’s good to be informed/know where you stand well before the age of consent.
And you have probably heard all of this hundreds of times and you might hear it a hundred more, so be sure you give some thought to it before you decided to have sex (or to not). From having sex with someone you’ve known for a week to someone you’ve known for a year is okay…as long as you’ve given thought to and understand what that may entail. But never, ever let anybody pressure you into acts that make you feel uncomfortable or that you may be unsure of. That is an immediate red flag.
If you are not sure whether you are ready to have sex or not, here is a list of wonderful resources that may help you answer that question:
Take as long as you need to find your answer. If your partner grows impatient…pfft, tell them to shove off then! If this is important to you, your partner should understand.
And as always, remember…your body is beautiful. Find someone that agrees.
*Age of Consent: The age of consent is the minimum age at which a person is considered to be legally competent of consenting to sexual acts.