Because I am a Woman

I am a graduate student studying in Worcester, MA. I am also a peer sex educator, reproductive justice activist, and feminist.

This blog is about sex-positivity, sex-ed, feminism, reproductive justice, birth justice, intersectionality, and activism.

Feel free to send me a message with your questions about sexual health, feminism, or anything else!

For more information about any of these things please check out the resources tab or leave me a question in my ask box! I would love to talk to you!

If you have anything you would like to bring to my attention or ask that you do not feel comfortable submitting to this page send me an email at: becauseiamawoman.tumblr@gmail.com

Many thanks to Susan of susanharkins.com for designing my logo!
Posts tagged "Scarleteen"
Asker Anonymous Asks:
So this is an odd question, but as a woman, I've only had sex with one man, and we both are negative for STDs, so why do I need to have a pelvic exam after I have had sex, when I was told I didn't need one as a virgin until I had sex? What changes in my vagina etc after sex that needs examining? Thanks!
becauseiamawoman becauseiamawoman Said:

Pelvic exams do a lot more than diagnose STIs. Here is a pretty concise explanation of the purpose of these exams from WebMD: 

 A pelvic exam helps a health professional evaluate the size and position of the vagina, cervix, uterus, and ovaries. It is an important part of preventive health care for all adult women. A pelvic exam is done to help detect certain cancers in their early stages, infections, sexually transmitted infections (STIs), or other reproductive system problems.
Basically, this exam can not only help you get treated for things like abnormal periods, infections, and STIs but it also plays a major role in general prevention and wellness. It is also worth mentioning that although you may have been tested for STIs in the past, if it wasn’t through a pelvic exam you likely were not tested for HPV. During these exams, your doctor may do a pap smear, which means that they would take a swab of your cervix. This can detect abnormal cells and HPV. Since HPV can lead to cervical cancer, this is a really important part of your health care. 
As far as virginity and pelvic exams go, you really should not opt-out of these exams simply because you have not had penetrative sex. Remember that every definition of virginity is different, and that there is not a medical condition. Since as previously discussed there is a lot more to it than STI testing, your sexual activity may play a role in these exams, but is not the star player of the visit. According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, you should begin getting these exams at 21, regardless of if you are having sex or not.
If you will be getting a pelvic exam for the first time and have any questions or concerns about how the exam works, I would highly recommend checking out this article on the topic from Scarleteen. It has a lot of really great information to help you mentally prepare.
Answer

fuckyeahsexeducation:

I’ve been looking through Scarleteen’s website and although I’d like to reblog almost every article, here are just a few that I think are really important.

From Ow! to Wow! Demystifying Painful Intercourse

something we talk about a lot here.

Disability Dharma: What Including & Learning From Disability Can Teach (Everyone) About Sex

Frank conversation about Disability and Sex is always great.

Magical Cups and Bloody Brides: Virginity in Context

Y’all are always hearing me talk about the horrible history of Virginity, well here you go.

Legit or Unfit? Finding Safe, Sound Sex Educators & Support Online

Of course based on some of the points I’m an unfit Sex Educator (but we already knew that) because unfortunately my only background in sex education is this website. However, I’m working to change that and trying to network with other more reputable sex educators so I can learn more and become more reputable. Also, as far as the name thing goes, I started off not indulging my name because I was trying to be more professional and also I found that if I just called myself FYSE that people wouldn’t always readily assume I was a woman which did wonders for my feelings of dysphoria and if someone wanted to know more about me I always gave out my private blog. However, with the new site I’m going to include my fool name because I want to use this as a chance to network and it’s just easier if people have a name to call you.

Text
You know you can text us, right?

hellyeahscarleteen:

For a couple years now, we’ve had a handy-dandy, free* SMS/text service  anyone with a cell and data plan can use to get one-on-one help or advice about sexuality, sexual health or relationships.

Whether you need help finding (or understanding) sexual healthcare, an LGBTQ group near you, have a question about your body, are struggling to deal with a breakup, trying to get the courage to take a pregnancy test or report an assault, our staff and volunteers are on call to talk with you directly and personally, without templates or auto-replies.

So, if you haven’t already, file our digits away for yourself or a friend should you ever be on the go and in need.  We’ll be at the ready to have your back. :)

*No charge from us for using this, but the usual charge your mobile provider charges for any text message you send applies. This service is also for US users only, due to mobile carrier restrictions.

(via sexeducationforyoureverydaylive)

Text
Possibly the Most Informative Young Adult Sex Ed Site →

(via fuckyeahsexeducation)

Link
hellyeahscarleteen: Back Up Your Birth Control Backup Day Yeah, we meant to say that. Boy do we wish we didn’t. Here’s the spiel: it’s Back Up Your Birth Control Day today, but as you may have heard, or personally experienced, here in the states, we’re still having a lot of trouble with pharmacists refusing over-the-counter Plan B (emergency contraception, the morning-after-pill, or whatever you like to call it), for a whole of reasons, including because of age, even though most of those asking for or about it are of legal age to get it over-the-counter, and without a prescription. We knew that was happening already, but that recent covert study linked there brought it more to light and gave this some more (very needed) attention. We understand that dealing with being refused something when you’re likely already feeling panicked, and also asking for something pretty private without much, if any privacy, can make dealing with refusals even more hard and maddening than they already are. We also know that in that position, sometimes it can be hard to speak up for yourself, especially if you feel judged because of being a young person who had any kind of sex in the first place (or were assaulted and assumptions are being made about you and sex), and a pharmacist is speaking or acting authoritatively, even while they’re talking out of their bottoms because they just don’t know the legal age or they’re knowingly deceiving you because they don’t want to dispense it and are just in the mood for some super-fun lording-power-over-young-people that day. But you’ve got rights, for crying out loud. If you’re of legal age to get emergency contraception over the counter, ayou cannot be lawfully refused on the basis of age. So, we thought we’d make this a bit easier for you to deal with if it happens, and to prepare yourself for, just in case. Attached at the end of this entry is a PDF file you can print as a handy helper.  It gives you four fold-over copies to cut down the dotted line, then fold in half. One can fit neatly — and, given the blank backside, privately — in your wallet. Since one page prints four, pass the other three (or more!) out to friends who might need it, too. On each little sheet, the left side shows the law right now around age and the right side says what you can and will do if refused EC. You can use it to read out loud, or even just slide it over to the pharmacist doing the refusing without saying a word, if you like. They may well change their mind about refusing you right there and then once you do that. But if they still refuse to give it to you based, then you also have all the steps about your next steps right in the palm of your hand. You can find your state pharmacy board and contacts for the given pharmacy’s higher-ups just by using a search engine. The text of this printable “Pardon me, but hell no,” reads: Over the counter Plan B, Plan B One Step, and their generic versions are approved to allow OTC availability of these products for consumers 17 years and older. Plan B, Plan B One Step, and their generic versions remain available by prescription only for women 16 years and younger. - U.S. Food and Drug Administration, last updated 12/16/2011, with a number you or the pharmacist could call the FDA with, and that’s 1-888-INFO-FDA. Besides that text is text that makes clear what you will do if refused, most of which comes from the National Women’s Law Center very helpful page on this issue, and that is: If I am refused Plan B, I will: • File a compliant with my state’s pharmacy board to seek sanctions against this pharmacist or pharmacy • Communicate my story to the press. • Alert this pharmacy’s corporate headquarters • Contact my ACLU affiliate (http://www.aclu.org/reproductive-freedom will allow you to find that affiliate) • Contact the national Women’s Law Center (which you can do regarding this issue by calling 1-866-PILL-4_US or emailing info@nwlc.org) Don’t forget that one thing you, friends or partners can always do to have BC backup when you need it is to get Plan B in advance when you have the chance to get it: that way you can avoid not just possible refusals, but avoid having to run around if and when the clock is ticking.  If you might ever need any — read: you might ever be at risk of pregnancy — and you don’t have it, next time you’re at a pharmacy and don’t need it can be a very good time to pick a pack up. Also, don’t forget that a lot of state health departments, Planned Parenthood branches and other sexual health clinics often dispense it themselves for cheaper than you can often get it at pharmacies, too. Go download the printable file from Scarleteen here, and please do pass this information and the file around as widely as possible!

hellyeahscarleteen:

Back Up Your Birth Control Backup Day

Yeah, we meant to say that. Boy do we wish we didn’t.

Here’s the spiel: it’s Back Up Your Birth Control Day today, but as you may have heard, or personally experienced, here in the states, we’re still having a lot of trouble with pharmacists refusing over-the-counter Plan B (emergency contraception, the morning-after-pill, or whatever you like to call it), for a whole of reasons, including because of age, even though most of those asking for or about it are of legal age to get it over-the-counter, and without a prescription. We knew that was happening already, but that recent covert study linked there brought it more to light and gave this some more (very needed) attention.

We understand that dealing with being refused something when you’re likely already feeling panicked, and also asking for something pretty private without much, if any privacy, can make dealing with refusals even more hard and maddening than they already are.

We also know that in that position, sometimes it can be hard to speak up for yourself, especially if you feel judged because of being a young person who had any kind of sex in the first place (or were assaulted and assumptions are being made about you and sex), and a pharmacist is speaking or acting authoritatively, even while they’re talking out of their bottoms because they just don’t know the legal age or they’re knowingly deceiving you because they don’t want to dispense it and are just in the mood for some super-fun lording-power-over-young-people that day.

But you’ve got rights, for crying out loud. If you’re of legal age to get emergency contraception over the counter, ayou cannot be lawfully refused on the basis of age.

So, we thought we’d make this a bit easier for you to deal with if it happens, and to prepare yourself for, just in case.

Attached at the end of this entry is a PDF file you can print as a handy helper.  It gives you four fold-over copies to cut down the dotted line, then fold in half. One can fit neatly — and, given the blank backside, privately — in your wallet. Since one page prints four, pass the other three (or more!) out to friends who might need it, too.

On each little sheet, the left side shows the law right now around age and the right side says what you can and will do if refused EC. You can use it to read out loud, or even just slide it over to the pharmacist doing the refusing without saying a word, if you like. They may well change their mind about refusing you right there and then once you do that.

But if they still refuse to give it to you based, then you also have all the steps about your next steps right in the palm of your hand. You can find your state pharmacy board and contacts for the given pharmacy’s higher-ups just by using a search engine.

The text of this printable “Pardon me, but hell no,” reads:

Over the counter Plan B, Plan B One Step, and their generic versions are approved to allow OTC availability of these products for consumers 17 years and older. Plan B, Plan B One Step, and their generic versions remain available by prescription only for women 16 years and younger. - U.S. Food and Drug Administration, last updated 12/16/2011, with a number you or the pharmacist could call the FDA with, and that’s 1-888-INFO-FDA.

Besides that text is text that makes clear what you will do if refused, most of which comes from the National Women’s Law Center very helpful page on this issue, and that is:

If I am refused Plan B, I will:
• File a compliant with my state’s pharmacy board to seek sanctions against this pharmacist or pharmacy
• Communicate my story to the press.
• Alert this pharmacy’s corporate headquarters
• Contact my ACLU affiliate (http://www.aclu.org/reproductive-freedom will allow you to find that affiliate)
• Contact the national Women’s Law Center (which you can do regarding this issue by calling 1-866-PILL-4_US or emailing info@nwlc.org)

Don’t forget that one thing you, friends or partners can always do to have BC backup when you need it is to get Plan B in advance when you have the chance to get it: that way you can avoid not just possible refusals, but avoid having to run around if and when the clock is ticking.  If you might ever need any — read: you might ever be at risk of pregnancy — and you don’t have it, next time you’re at a pharmacy and don’t need it can be a very good time to pick a pack up. Also, don’t forget that a lot of state health departments, Planned Parenthood branches and other sexual health clinics often dispense it themselves for cheaper than you can often get it at pharmacies, too.

Go download the printable file from Scarleteen here, and please do pass this information and the file around as widely as possible!

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